While picking berries this morning, I was thinking about being told "No" when all I really wanted was a resounding "Yes." In retrospect, I have to admit that many of those "No" answers were a blessing. I really didn't need or even want what I asked for. Other times the "No" meant a time of growth and later understanding. Then there were the times that seemed a mystery, even arbitrary. Yet, my trust in God won't allow for arbitrary. So that is where my thoughts roamed as I reached for each juicy red raspberry.
I really didn't have any particular instance in mind. I was just wondering. Wondering why some prayers are answered immediately. Wondering why some are answered eventually Wondering why some are put on hold. Some yeses, some noes, some just wait.
Then a thought. I have taught early childhood education for 25 years. The faces of several former students came to mind. Through the years I have had a handful of students who for one reason or another were never taught the meaning of "No." Sometimes there was no carry through leaving the word meaningless. Sometimes the word was rarely spoken leaving it a foreign language. These kids had a really tough time learning to deal with the structure of a school environment. Life as a student was not what they expected and they pushed back. Until they realized the meaning of "No" and accepted it, life was miserable.
Without explanation. That was what I often expected from these 4-6 year olds. We talked about the why, but I needed them to accept that sometimes there is a "No" without explanation.
So right there in the berry patch I realized that I was really just a 6 year old asking why. Yet sometimes there is a "No" without explanation. Nothing arbitrary. Just a loving God who knows what is best for me. A loving God who knows what would happen to that 6 year old child in me if she were not reigned in.
